So when are you having baby number two???

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I don't know how many of your who read my blog have ever had problems with infertility but this question is probably one of the most awkward/painful questions to answer.  I know that people who ask this don't mean to be hurtful.  I must admit that there are times that I see pregnant women and wonder if I will ever feel the kicks and movements of another baby.  I wonder if I will ever have another birth story to tell.  After I had Judah, the thought of never having the chance to get pregnant again made me sad.  Now I realize that I am so blessed.  I understand that there are many families out there that will never experience what David and I have experienced.

There are so many women that go through IVF over and over again.  To you, I tip my hat.  I don't know if I could survive going through shots, hormones, and anticipation again.  The plan???  Well what we are praying for it to be able to adopt when Judah is about 3 years old.  Perhaps a little sister for Judah.

I don't know what God has in store for us.  All we can do is trust that one day our little family will grow however that may be.

5 Months Pregnant

Today I am five months pregnant!  I can't believe how fast the time has passed it really feels like it was just yesterday I was praying that one day I would meet you.  Well because I'm five months already I got to see you again.  Actually, it was me, your daddy, grandma, tio, and tia.  They all wanted to see you and find out whether you are a little girl or a little boy.  Well today we found out that you are a little baby boy.  My son.  I can't believe it.  I honestly thought that you were a girl, sorry love.  Now I really can't wait to meet you!!  You were all over the place.  Moving and squirming all over.  For a split second you came right up to the place were the tech had the wand thingy and waved right at us like you knew that we were there watching. :)  Feeling you move inside of my belly is one of the most amazing feelings.  I promise you that I will be the best mom I can be.  

Everyone is so excited.  Especially your daddy.  He talks to you and about you all the time!  You are going to love him.  I know that he is going to be such a great dad.  I love you will all of me!

A

First Test

Okay so now I know why they tell you not to test before your "official" pregnancy test. Yesterday while I was out with my sister I decided to get a pregnancy test. I had been passing by these pregnancy tests for days and I couldn't help but wonder if it was too soon. Well, per my doctor and most websites they say that you shouldn't really test before because the HSG levels may be off because of all the medication that can still be in your system. You can either get a false positive or a false negative. I just wanted to see what the test would read if i took it. Well I came home and waited for *D* to get home and that test was just burning a hole in the bag that it was in. Deep breath. When he got home we talked a little about it and it was driving us both crazy... so I took it. Well as you can see we did not get the positive that we were expecting BUT we have not lost hope. Some women will have a negative even though they are pregnant so. Now the waiting is even more excruciating!! There is only three more days till the big test.